Weekend Wrapup

Mission Impossible II: Return to IKEA 

<cue theme music>

Mr. Semitough. Your mission, should you be stupid enough to accept it, is to return the the Swedish furniture store accompanied by your IMF team. Once there you are to locate and extricate a piece of stylized Swedish furniture suitable for use as a computer workstation. Once you have liberated the furniture you will encounter the most dangerous portion of your assignment….assembly. Good luck. As always, if killed or captured WordPress will disavow your actions.

Well, not exactly like that but Esposa and Energizer Buddy conspired to force the return. However this time I was determined to make this visit on my terms. Rule #1 of suburban survival: Choose your time wisely, especially when it comes to forced shopping trips. I selected Friday afternoon at 4:00 pm. Brilliant! We had the place to ourselves. So far, so good.

One observation though, IKEA must be some kind of cult thing. No fewer than three shoppers came up while we were looking at various items and said “I have that…it’s really great…I love mine.” Kinda creepy.

Then the Buddy threw a wrench in things by finding everything else to buy except the desk we took thim there to buy. Sheesh Buddy, us guys are supposed to stick together. So after about 30 minutes of scouting crap that we had no intention of buying he decides on the desk (of course the very same one we came there to get in the first place.) But I suspect we’ll be back for that bedroom furniture he spied, of course then it won’t match the desk we just bought. Geez.

Clearing the scene was no problem what with the Toughmobile. Loaded that flat puppy up and headed back to the Semitough Love Ranch for the assembly portion of our adventure. You know how sometimes you get those instructions that are translated into like 42 languages? Well the Swedes have that all figured out. No words. Seriously, 14 pages of instructions. The only word in the booklet was the name on the front cover. Jerker. I think they were mocking me.

Anyway, it got done. Buddy’s happy. Esposa is happy. And Semitough survived another suburban peril, a second trip to IKEA. I suppose it’s true what they say, that which doesn’t kill us makes us stronger.

Quick movie review: Didn’t go to the theater but did the “Comcast is being replaced by Time Warner Cable in your area enjoy the ride” OnDemand thing. “Rented” Failure to launch with hippie bongo boy Matthew Whateverhey, Mrs. War Games boy, and Terry Bradshaw. Nobody told me Bradshaw was going to be naked in this film. Whatever happened to parental warnings? The biggest thing I learned is that time is the great equalizer. He may be a former Super Bowl winning quarterback but once you get past 50 one wide white pretty much looks like another. Good movie though. Check it out….two toughs up.


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